Posted: April 8, 2009
She was abandoned by her teenage Father when she was 1 year old. He would try to make it right, but he could not reverse the the damage he had done.
She never forgave him.
He will never forgive himself.
She lived a full life. Experiencing all that she could find. Repeating the pain of her abandonment with every man in her Fathers wake. Destroyed. Degraded. Left in a ditch. Left in a trailer. Over and over again.
Her fire raged.
She couldn’t stop the pain.
She loved her people.
She could not love herself.
She couldn’t see herself, because if she had she would have known the dream that I saw in her eyes. She would have known the sun that she brought to me in her smile.
She fought through it all. Fierce.
The first time I met her she stole some candy and gave it to me. She made me laugh. She always made me feel like I was okay. She was my mirror, and for the first time, I liked what I saw.
Her heart was deepest red.
As the years took their toll, the wounds cut to the core. The weight of it all was unbearable. The losses were insurmountable.
The decisions of the past reverberate in eternity.
Today she will know that she will soon be gone. That it will all finally be over. The struggle is given, the outcome has been written. Time will always take its share in the end.
I wish for her to haunt me. I want her twinkle in my eye. I want her ghost in my dreams. I want her laugh in my soul. I wish for her pure heart to feel the grace of light. Please let the pain die first.
Let her children shine.